Wow! How time flies when you are visiting Ukraine for your third and final adoption trip! Let me do a brief catch-up. We left home Wednesday morning, flew from Raleigh to Newark, NJ and then on to Dusseldorf, Germany where we enjoyed a few hours and a lite breakfast before heading on to Kyiv, Ukraine. We arrived in Kyiv on Thursday afternoon, went with our driver to the train station, exchanged money, bought water and snacks, and got on the train. Our train ride (15 hours overnight - arriving in Simferopol on Friday morning) was actually quite pleasant and relaxing. This particular Raleigh to Simferopol journey was kind of interesting because we were transporting clothing for four people (ourselves plus the kids) in baggage for just the two of us. It was not easy, and it made us really happy to think that on the return trip, we'll have two additional able-bodied people to help carry all of this! In fact, throughout all of the travel (plane and train) it was really exciting thinking that the next time we do these things, we'll have Lera and Vitalik with us!!
We were met in Simferopol by our friendly driver and a new facilitator, who was also nice. The facilitator had arrived one day earlier to pick up our adoption decree from the court. We squeezed all of our baggage into the trunk and headed straight for the town where the kids were born (about an hour's drive) to request a their new birth certificates. After the drive there, we sat in the car and waited for perhaps an hour. When the facilitator returned, the news was not good. There was a mistake in the court document, and we had to return to Simferopol. It was a little scary, frustrating, and we were again helpless, but we tried to be patient and confident and just see how it all turned out - blessedly, it ended well. I will spare you the details, but we burned up that one-hour strip of 2-lane highway on Friday (with a lot of waiting in the car at various stops), and finally, at the end of the day, we did indeed have new birth certificates that have the kids' new names and list us as their parents. We were so thankful!
The time was about 5:30pm on Friday, and we headed straight for the orphanage. (Please keep in mind that we had been traveling in planes, trains, and automobiles for three days straight, and probably didn't look our best, but oh well!) It was awesome to see Vitalik and Lera, of course. It is an amazing feeling to get to give someone a big hug after you have literally traveled across the world to see them. Just awesome! We had 30 minutes to walk and visit with just the four of us. We were so thankful that our facilitator had just worked out a schedule for the next few days so that we could tell them what to expect. The plan is this:
- Visit at noon on Saturday and Sunday
- Have their farewell party at 3pm on Monday
- Sign them out on Tuesday, go apply for new passports, and then begin living together in a Simferopol apartment for a week while we wait for the new passports to be ready...then to Kyiv for a few days... then to America.
Both kids were very excited and perhaps a little giddy with this news. Vitalik took longer than usual to be confident that he got it, and kept wanting to review the details to be sure that he really understood. It must feel pretty surreal to them both - it certainly does to me and I'm almost forty! Lera refused to acknowledge that she understood and just kept giggling and shouting with a smile, "NO! I don't understand!" Vitalk wanted to know at exactly what time we would be going to the supermarket. "Supermarket, what o'clock?" With a big grin, he mimed himself pushing a shopping cart through the grocery store and putting one of everything in his cart. It is said that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, and I'm pretty sure that the same is true of teenage boys! This is one boy who can not wait to have whatever he wants to eat, and I for one can not wait to feed him!
We walked to the playground and spent an awesome 20 minutes or so doing various tricks and flips. A real highlight was when about 4 of us spotted Eugene as he attempted a backbend! It was laugh-out-loud funny! At the end of the visit, the facilitator told them the plan in Russian, ending with, "On Tuesday we will take you away from Lezevoyeh forever," again, Lera refused to believe and finally Eugene told her, "Lera, pravda (truth)!" which made her literally jump and down with joy. It was really awesome to see. We said "Da zavtra!" and headed home with grins on our faces. After a quick stop at a tiny market, we were home (FINALLY) to take a hot bath and eat an easy dinner of sliced summer sausage, cheese, and bread.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
The Transitive Property of Love :o)
It has been almost 2 weeks since our court date. The 10-day waiting period is over, and today we begin our final adoption trip to Ukraine. This trip will take 2.5 weeks and will involve acquiring new birth certificates, new passports, and getting the kids through US immigration. After visiting the orphanage for a few days, we will have a farewell party and bring Vitalik and Lera to live with us in our Simferopol apartment while we wait for necessary paperwork to be completed. It is exciting (and a little scary!) to think of being together for more than just a few hours at a time. This will be a really awesome time of beginning to live through some of the joys and some of the pains of this enormous transition in all of our lives.
As we have been preparing for this final trip, we have so appreciated the amazing support that we have received from our family and community. It is beyond incredible for us to be having this globe-trotting adventure at this stage in our lives... knowing that our three little boys are incredibly well cared for and our home and lives are running smoothly while we are away. Words simply cannot adequately express our gratitude.
Last night I begin thinking about the transitive property of love. As I recall from my middle school math class, the Transitive property of equality goes something like this: "A=B and B=C... therefore A=C" My realization last night was that love works in exactly the same way. We are blessed to be authentically loved by so many special people. We genuinely love Lera and Vitalik. The amazing thing is that so many who love us already love Lera and Vitalik before they have ever met them. I think it will be really strange and awesome for our new kids to begin to realize this special truth!
So as we sit in the airport awaiting our first flight in this final adoption journey, we are filled with hope for the future, and with sincere gratitude for the transitive property of love.
As we have been preparing for this final trip, we have so appreciated the amazing support that we have received from our family and community. It is beyond incredible for us to be having this globe-trotting adventure at this stage in our lives... knowing that our three little boys are incredibly well cared for and our home and lives are running smoothly while we are away. Words simply cannot adequately express our gratitude.
Last night I begin thinking about the transitive property of love. As I recall from my middle school math class, the Transitive property of equality goes something like this: "A=B and B=C... therefore A=C" My realization last night was that love works in exactly the same way. We are blessed to be authentically loved by so many special people. We genuinely love Lera and Vitalik. The amazing thing is that so many who love us already love Lera and Vitalik before they have ever met them. I think it will be really strange and awesome for our new kids to begin to realize this special truth!
So as we sit in the airport awaiting our first flight in this final adoption journey, we are filled with hope for the future, and with sincere gratitude for the transitive property of love.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Our Day in Court
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| Before leaving for court. We were SO nervous! |
There was snow this morning, which made getting to court a real challenge. Apparently, the car had real problems getting to the orphanage and almost didn't make it. They were then late getting us, and ended up calling and telling us to walk toward "the main road" to meet them. We walked the wrong way, and thankfully, Vitalik must have seen us out the window, and he ran down the sidewalk - like maybe 2 blocks and got our attention to send us back in the right direction. The streets and sidewalks were covered in snow and I was, obviously, not wearing snow boots, so I ended up holding Vitalik's arm most of the way to keep from falling. "Moi tooflee, no good, sneig. (my shoes, no good, snow) Understand?" He answered with one of his favorite English phrases - "I understand," which he somehow jumbles into about 2 syllables, always with a quick, confident nod- it's awesome!
Before court, everyone was nervous and we were all trying not to look nervous to one another. The court hearing lasted about 2.5 hours and was incredibly intense and included a lot of scary moments. We left the courtroom while the judge and jury discussed the case, and then returned for the verdict. What a relief it was to have this part of the adoption journey completed!! We were all completely exhausted and stressed out, but relieved and finally beginning to breathe again, I think.
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| After court - tired, happy, and cold! |
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| Wiped-out and happy kids waiting for the celebratory lunch in a restaurant - what a treat! |
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| There were very few lite moments on this very serious day. I suppose this is why this picture is my personal favorite! The room in which we waited before and after court had this little holding cell in the corner. After court was over and after all of the important people had left, Eugene and Vitalik paused for this rather obvious photo-op. I love it! |
After having lunch with the kids, their social worker, our facilitator, and driver, they took the kids back to the orphanage, we helped the facilitator chase down the 4:20 train (we should be getting used to running in the cold snowy weather by now!) and finally we were dropped off at our apartment (doma sweet doma!)
Tomorrow we visit once more before getting on the train and beginning the 2-day trip home. We will return for our third trip and expect to spend lots of that time in a Simferopol apartment with the kids getting a taste of what it feels like to actually live together. We know that there will be challenges, but we can't wait to get started!
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Another Priceless Day
I am beginning to notice a recurring theme of patience weaving itself throughout my blog posts. For sure, living in the moment is one of the great lessons of this adventure, and now that I think of it, it's probably one of the lessons we will learn from our new kids. Like so much of life, there is a temptation to wish our way right through this time we are spending in Ukraine. We just want to fast-forward to a successful court verdict, through the waiting period, through immigration processing, and move right to the part of the story where Lera and Vitalik gracefully enter OUR world.
With God's help, soon, they will indeed be entering our world. They will have to learn about our customs, our language, our culture, our music, our fashions, our everything. How dare we rush through this precious time in which the tables are turned, and we are having the privilege of struggling to live in their world for a little while?
Last night as we were going to sleep, we thought about what today would hold. More of the same - visiting at the orphanage. Then somehow, it occurred to us just how few days like this we will have in our entire lives, and just how precious each one of them is. These intense, exhausting, exhillerating, unpredictable days of visiting with our new kids on their home turf are just so special. What a privilege it is to hang out with Lera, Vitalik, and their friends in their environment, playing their games and doing our best to speak their language. We went into today with that attitude, and I have to say, it was just awesome.
Again, we were there with no translator, and it's just not a big deal any more. I think that as much as our learning Russian, or their learning English, there is this awesome reality that we are all just learning one another. We can communicate with Vitalik and Lera, but their friends don't always understand us. Basically, we tell them what we want to say using a combination of our Russian and their English and then they can communicate to their friends using actual Russian. It's hillarious and fun, and the beautiful thing is that we are all gaining confidence with one another.
Today, for the first time, Vitalik invited us to hang out in his room. We were so glad, because seeing their rooms had kind of been something we wanted to do, but we weren't sure we were allowed to go there. After a brief time in the lobby, Vitalik said in English, "We go my room, ok?" He led us all, including a few friends, up the stairs, down the hall, and into the room he shares with all of the boys in his class. The room is bright and cheery, with tons of windows and natural light and many healthy plants that would all die if they came to my house. There were about 20 neat little beds all lined up, but I don't know that all of them are occupied. He led us to his bed, smoothed the covers, and offered us a seat.
He jokingly explained that his bed is strategically located so that he he can punch is good friend in the head if the need should arise. :o) We shared chocolates that Eugene had given to Lera and me in celebration of International Women's Day, one of the major holidays in Ukraine, similar to Valentines day, in which all girls and women get flowers, candy, and gifts. The many kids watched a Spiderman movie on Eugene's i-pad.
Vitalik and Eugene engaged in a friendly sparring match using their best attempts at boxing, karate, and sumo wrestling! It was so fun to watch, and I was so glad that watcing was my job. Eugene, on the other hand, got a serious workout. :o) They laughed and punched and sweated and had a great time until they were both completely tired. (Ya Oostal!)
The driver came up after awhile and hung out a little bit. He seemed to be explaining to the kids a little bit about when they would be picked up for court tomorrow (our hearing is at 11am). We didn't understand the exact dialog at all of course, but it was clear that they were discussing something about going to court tomorrow. Then it was time for the kids to have lunch, and for us to go home. As we all left the room, Vitalik looked at me, pointed to himself, and said with a nod, "Viatliy Michael Cline." I smiled and agreed, "Yes, good!" and we went downstairs where, again, they easily managed to negotiate a ride to the cafeteria. We hugged and said our goodbyes, "Da Zavtra!" (until tomorrow) and came back to the apartment.
For our lunch, Eugene insisted that we walk three blocks in the sub-freezing snowing windy day and try our hand at ordering lunch in a restaurant. We were a bit of a sideshow for the locals, but dog-gone-it, we did it and it was fun. We hung out eating the mysterious foods we had managed to acquire and relaxed and discussed the special time we had just enjoyed at the orphanage. It was indeed another very special day.
So tomorrow we go to court. When Eugene asked our facilitator if there was anything we needed to do in preparation, his advice was simple. "Relax and pray." We agreed that this was great advice, so that is our strategy. We really don't know if we'll get a verdict tomorrow, but more than anything, we just pray that sometime soon we can bring the kids home with us. Also, we pray that they will not find the experience traumatic tomorrow. Their whole lives hang in the balance and they are totally powerless.
On some level, I'm scared to death, but as we've covered before, fear is not from God. Throughout this adventure, I have found myself really appreciating a great little diddy I remember from early Veggie Tales. It provides me with some comfort as I go to sleep tonight. It goes like this:
God is bigger than the Boogie Man.
He's bigger than Godzilla and the monsters on TV
Oh, God is bigger than the Boogie Man
And I know that he's watching over me.
May it be so.
With God's help, soon, they will indeed be entering our world. They will have to learn about our customs, our language, our culture, our music, our fashions, our everything. How dare we rush through this precious time in which the tables are turned, and we are having the privilege of struggling to live in their world for a little while?
Last night as we were going to sleep, we thought about what today would hold. More of the same - visiting at the orphanage. Then somehow, it occurred to us just how few days like this we will have in our entire lives, and just how precious each one of them is. These intense, exhausting, exhillerating, unpredictable days of visiting with our new kids on their home turf are just so special. What a privilege it is to hang out with Lera, Vitalik, and their friends in their environment, playing their games and doing our best to speak their language. We went into today with that attitude, and I have to say, it was just awesome.
Again, we were there with no translator, and it's just not a big deal any more. I think that as much as our learning Russian, or their learning English, there is this awesome reality that we are all just learning one another. We can communicate with Vitalik and Lera, but their friends don't always understand us. Basically, we tell them what we want to say using a combination of our Russian and their English and then they can communicate to their friends using actual Russian. It's hillarious and fun, and the beautiful thing is that we are all gaining confidence with one another.
Today, for the first time, Vitalik invited us to hang out in his room. We were so glad, because seeing their rooms had kind of been something we wanted to do, but we weren't sure we were allowed to go there. After a brief time in the lobby, Vitalik said in English, "We go my room, ok?" He led us all, including a few friends, up the stairs, down the hall, and into the room he shares with all of the boys in his class. The room is bright and cheery, with tons of windows and natural light and many healthy plants that would all die if they came to my house. There were about 20 neat little beds all lined up, but I don't know that all of them are occupied. He led us to his bed, smoothed the covers, and offered us a seat.
He jokingly explained that his bed is strategically located so that he he can punch is good friend in the head if the need should arise. :o) We shared chocolates that Eugene had given to Lera and me in celebration of International Women's Day, one of the major holidays in Ukraine, similar to Valentines day, in which all girls and women get flowers, candy, and gifts. The many kids watched a Spiderman movie on Eugene's i-pad.
Vitalik and Eugene engaged in a friendly sparring match using their best attempts at boxing, karate, and sumo wrestling! It was so fun to watch, and I was so glad that watcing was my job. Eugene, on the other hand, got a serious workout. :o) They laughed and punched and sweated and had a great time until they were both completely tired. (Ya Oostal!)
The driver came up after awhile and hung out a little bit. He seemed to be explaining to the kids a little bit about when they would be picked up for court tomorrow (our hearing is at 11am). We didn't understand the exact dialog at all of course, but it was clear that they were discussing something about going to court tomorrow. Then it was time for the kids to have lunch, and for us to go home. As we all left the room, Vitalik looked at me, pointed to himself, and said with a nod, "Viatliy Michael Cline." I smiled and agreed, "Yes, good!" and we went downstairs where, again, they easily managed to negotiate a ride to the cafeteria. We hugged and said our goodbyes, "Da Zavtra!" (until tomorrow) and came back to the apartment.
So tomorrow we go to court. When Eugene asked our facilitator if there was anything we needed to do in preparation, his advice was simple. "Relax and pray." We agreed that this was great advice, so that is our strategy. We really don't know if we'll get a verdict tomorrow, but more than anything, we just pray that sometime soon we can bring the kids home with us. Also, we pray that they will not find the experience traumatic tomorrow. Their whole lives hang in the balance and they are totally powerless.
On some level, I'm scared to death, but as we've covered before, fear is not from God. Throughout this adventure, I have found myself really appreciating a great little diddy I remember from early Veggie Tales. It provides me with some comfort as I go to sleep tonight. It goes like this:
God is bigger than the Boogie Man.
He's bigger than Godzilla and the monsters on TV
Oh, God is bigger than the Boogie Man
And I know that he's watching over me.
May it be so.
Monday, March 7, 2011
40 hours travel time - well worth the trip!! :o)
We left our home in Cary at 11am local time on Saturday, and to make a long story short, we arrived in Simferopol this Monday morning at 9am Ukraine time (2am EST). Upon getting off the train, we said hello to our driver who speaks no Engilsh, but is very easy to chat with, as he cheerfully tolerates our horrible Russian. We had no translator today, so the driver called our facilitator (who is still in Kyiv, and will arrive on Wednesday morning just in time for court) to find out if it was time for us to go to the orphanage. The routine for these next couple of days goes like this. The facilitator is in Kyiv, and is the only one who speaks both languages, and he is calling all of the shots. When we aren't sure what to do next, the driver calls him, they speak in Russian on the phone, then the driver hands the phone to Eugene, and he gets the story in English. All-in-all, it works just fine.
Sadly, our first phone call of the day was not good. Eugene learned that Vitalik was not at the orphanage, but was in the "hospital". He was told that we would not be able to see Vitalik until we picked him up on Wednesday morning before court. The facilitator thought that he might have had an upper respiratory infection. We were not as surprised as you might think. We had learned through the grapevine of other folks who visited the orphanage in the past couple of weeks that both Lera and Vitalik (who were both perfectly healthy) had spent at least one week in the hospital for what seemed to be a routine checkup (don't ask me why a check-up takes a week!) We were really sad to hear that Vitalik had actually gotten sick and was still there! We tried to adjust our thinking to this new plan and got ready to visit with Lera. Our first visit today was very nice - Lera ran to greet us and gave us huge hugs! She looked at photos and we practiced a little English/Russian using flashcards on Eugene's I-pad. After about one hour, it was time for us to leave.
Somehow in the conversations we had with Lera and the driver on our first visit, the driver ended up calling the facilitator again and asking a few more questions about whether we could see Vitalik. We did not ask him to call, but we were so glad he did! This conversation somehow prompted our facilitator to do a little more digging about Vitalik's condition, and somehow, miraculously, Vitalik was back at the orphanage (healthy as a horse) before our next visit at 4pm! This is just an example of how things turn on a dime and we really never have a clue what is going on!
We were just delighted to see him of course, and he seemed very happy to see us too - he could not explain why he had been in the hospital for 2 weeks. Eugene asked him if he had gotten any shots and he said no, but indicated that he had gotten his finger pricked (not once, but twice!) ... He did laugh when the driver suggested that he was just taking a nice break from school and having a good rest. Honestly, it seems to me that nobody ever tells these kids anything - they never know what is coming next, and they just roll with whatever each day brings. Throughout the next 2 hours, we had an awesome visit with both Vitalik and Lera (the driver and several friends hung out with us. Vitalik tossed a ball with Eugene (and by "tossed" i mean "threw the HECK out of")... it is really interesting to watch a teenaged boy test his strength against a man. This is one example of a time that a woman is simply not capable of filling the role. They had an awesome time throwing this ball back and forth with as much strength as either of them could muster, and it was really fun to watch. The kids all climbed on various monkey bars and trees for a few good photo ops. It was FREEZING cold outside, and the kids all want to take off their coats. They are good Ukrainians and are much tougher in the cold than we wimpy Americans, I think!
During the past 24 hours, there have been multiple long walks in very cold weather. Our muscles ache and we just keep drinking hot tea. Our bodies are exhausted, but our hearts are at peace (at least, I think they are).
So our facilitator will meet us only an hour before court on Wednesday. We spent a few relaxed hours with him in Kyiv before hopping on the train. He gave us a 2 hour walking tour of Kyiv (it was truly a pleasure, although the weather was a challenge - a sunny but windy 0 degrees Celcius!) We were glad for history lesson, the exercise, and we were extremely glad for the warm soup and tea that we shared afterward. After dinner, he spent a few minutes preparing us for our court date. It seems that there are a few items about which the court could request additional supporting information that we would need additional days to obtain. It seems that it will not be surprising if we are not able to get a verdict on this "first court date" and we might actually need a second one, which we would hope would be only a day or two later. Essentially, we have done everything we can do to prepare for this, and all that we can do now is pray and wait. So we are asking for lots of prayers. First and foremost, our prayer is that sometime soon, we will be able to bring the kids home. If it takes more than one court date, we will try to take that in stride... of course, our strong preference will be to get a YES on WEDNESDAY after only one court date - but we will try hard to trust God's timing.
Sadly, our first phone call of the day was not good. Eugene learned that Vitalik was not at the orphanage, but was in the "hospital". He was told that we would not be able to see Vitalik until we picked him up on Wednesday morning before court. The facilitator thought that he might have had an upper respiratory infection. We were not as surprised as you might think. We had learned through the grapevine of other folks who visited the orphanage in the past couple of weeks that both Lera and Vitalik (who were both perfectly healthy) had spent at least one week in the hospital for what seemed to be a routine checkup (don't ask me why a check-up takes a week!) We were really sad to hear that Vitalik had actually gotten sick and was still there! We tried to adjust our thinking to this new plan and got ready to visit with Lera. Our first visit today was very nice - Lera ran to greet us and gave us huge hugs! She looked at photos and we practiced a little English/Russian using flashcards on Eugene's I-pad. After about one hour, it was time for us to leave.
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| Lera loves to use the camera to take pictures of herself, and to pose for her friends who enjoy playing photographer. This was one of my favorites from today's photo shoot. :o) |
We were just delighted to see him of course, and he seemed very happy to see us too - he could not explain why he had been in the hospital for 2 weeks. Eugene asked him if he had gotten any shots and he said no, but indicated that he had gotten his finger pricked (not once, but twice!) ... He did laugh when the driver suggested that he was just taking a nice break from school and having a good rest. Honestly, it seems to me that nobody ever tells these kids anything - they never know what is coming next, and they just roll with whatever each day brings. Throughout the next 2 hours, we had an awesome visit with both Vitalik and Lera (the driver and several friends hung out with us. Vitalik tossed a ball with Eugene (and by "tossed" i mean "threw the HECK out of")... it is really interesting to watch a teenaged boy test his strength against a man. This is one example of a time that a woman is simply not capable of filling the role. They had an awesome time throwing this ball back and forth with as much strength as either of them could muster, and it was really fun to watch. The kids all climbed on various monkey bars and trees for a few good photo ops. It was FREEZING cold outside, and the kids all want to take off their coats. They are good Ukrainians and are much tougher in the cold than we wimpy Americans, I think!
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| SOOOO thankful he is out of the hospital - how crazy!! |
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| Look Ma, no Head! Lera took this photo - I'm thinking, "Us-to-rozhno, Vitalik!" (be careful!) |
Later, back indoors, we played cards and various computer games, ate cookies and candy, and just had a very fun time. Midway through our visit, Vitalik asked "Zavtra, what oclock?" (what time will we visit tomorrow?) Eugene told him that the facilitator was the boss, and Vitalik joked, "I boss." As we left, without us having a clue what was going on, Vitalik and Lera ran ahead of us and got into the car. They had conned the driver (who adores all of the kids there) to give them a ride for the approximately 300 yards from the dorm to the cafeteria. While in the car, they all spoke more Russian and as usual, we were lost. While we waited, the driver called the facilitator and after they talked, he handed the phone to Eugene. The message was this, "They want you to come at 11am tomorrow, is this okay?" Eugene agreed, and I just had to laugh because it seems that in this case, Vitalik was indeed the boss! ;-)
During the past 24 hours, there have been multiple long walks in very cold weather. Our muscles ache and we just keep drinking hot tea. Our bodies are exhausted, but our hearts are at peace (at least, I think they are).
So our facilitator will meet us only an hour before court on Wednesday. We spent a few relaxed hours with him in Kyiv before hopping on the train. He gave us a 2 hour walking tour of Kyiv (it was truly a pleasure, although the weather was a challenge - a sunny but windy 0 degrees Celcius!) We were glad for history lesson, the exercise, and we were extremely glad for the warm soup and tea that we shared afterward. After dinner, he spent a few minutes preparing us for our court date. It seems that there are a few items about which the court could request additional supporting information that we would need additional days to obtain. It seems that it will not be surprising if we are not able to get a verdict on this "first court date" and we might actually need a second one, which we would hope would be only a day or two later. Essentially, we have done everything we can do to prepare for this, and all that we can do now is pray and wait. So we are asking for lots of prayers. First and foremost, our prayer is that sometime soon, we will be able to bring the kids home. If it takes more than one court date, we will try to take that in stride... of course, our strong preference will be to get a YES on WEDNESDAY after only one court date - but we will try hard to trust God's timing.
Friday, March 4, 2011
Trip 2-of-3 ... Leaving Tomorrow!
After weeks and weeks of waiting, we have been assigned a court date of Wednesday, March 9th at 11am. We learned this about 10 days ago, and just knowing that we have a court date has made it a lot easier to breathe. Eugene and I leave around 11am tomorrow morning (Saturday) and will begin the 2 day process of getting to Simferopol, Ukraine. We expect (and hope!) that we will be able to see Vitalik and Lera for a day or two before court, and maybe one day after court, then we will begin the 2-day return trip. The plan is that this trip will last just over one week.
Every region in Ukraine is different, and in Crimea, where our kids are, as we have been learning, everything seems to take more time! We have had the blessing of following another local family who have just adopted from the same orphanage and their court date lasted 2 hours and was extremely serious. There will be a judge, a jury, and a prosecutor whose job it is to try to prove that we are unfit parents. Doesn't that sound like fun!?
Thankfully, we are told that the burden of proof is on them -- that by just getting to this point, it is assumed that we ARE fit parents, so as much as possible, we are supposed to sit still, be quiet, and answer questions directly in as few words as possible. This is not my strength, but in this case, I will sure try hard!
It seems like it's been forever since we arrived home from our first trip, though it has actually been just a little over a month. For about the first week at home, I was really really scared about court. It is an amazing thing that after all that we've been through in the past six months, the entire adoption could all fall apart in one day if something goes wrong. Of course, this is NOT a good way to think! I had to remind myself that fear is not one of the fruits of the Spirit... in short, fear is not from God. In order to get past this fear, I just had to remember the chain of miraculous events last summer that led us so quickly to total clarity about adopting Lera and Vitalik. The events of this past August were humbling, amazing, and just plain a God thing. I decided many weeks ago that if God can make all of the crazy things happen in the way that they did for our new kids to even BE on the trip to America in the first place... and then for us to be at the park and hear about them, and for all of the sparks that were flying to just affirm and affirm that this was God's plan for us, why in the WORLD would I worry that God can't get us through a couple of hours in a Crimean court room!?
So, for several weeks now, I've not felt afraid about court, though I'm sure it will be really intense, and when it gets here, I hope I'll just be able to breathe! I imagine that it will be really scary too for Vitalik and Lera. It is my prayer that as we prepare for, and live through our court date, all of us will feel at peace and will just be able to do our best. Most of all, obviously, I just pray for a good verdict, so that after another waiting period, we can return to begin the 2-3 week process of bringing the kids home for good!
Tonight, Eugene and I took the boys to the airport where we had the privilege of joining in the celebration as we welcomed the first of this summer's kids home for good! David Yaroslav (formerly Yarik) is 13, and has just left the same orphanage that we will be heading to tomorrow.
It is hard to describe how his arrival tonight has provided such a gift of encouragement to our spirits as we set off tomorrow on the next leg of our adventure! We had just seen David kickin' around the orphanage with his pals during our last trip to Ukraine, and now he is home with his new family just a mile or two away from our house! It's like, wow - this can really happen! It was such a blessing to be there tonight to see his new family and friends celebrate his arrival! We hope and pray (and even, dare I say - expect!) that it will not be long before David joins the crowd of family and friends who will form the welcoming party as we arrive home with Vitalik and Lera! Please God, may it be so!!
Every region in Ukraine is different, and in Crimea, where our kids are, as we have been learning, everything seems to take more time! We have had the blessing of following another local family who have just adopted from the same orphanage and their court date lasted 2 hours and was extremely serious. There will be a judge, a jury, and a prosecutor whose job it is to try to prove that we are unfit parents. Doesn't that sound like fun!?
Thankfully, we are told that the burden of proof is on them -- that by just getting to this point, it is assumed that we ARE fit parents, so as much as possible, we are supposed to sit still, be quiet, and answer questions directly in as few words as possible. This is not my strength, but in this case, I will sure try hard!
It seems like it's been forever since we arrived home from our first trip, though it has actually been just a little over a month. For about the first week at home, I was really really scared about court. It is an amazing thing that after all that we've been through in the past six months, the entire adoption could all fall apart in one day if something goes wrong. Of course, this is NOT a good way to think! I had to remind myself that fear is not one of the fruits of the Spirit... in short, fear is not from God. In order to get past this fear, I just had to remember the chain of miraculous events last summer that led us so quickly to total clarity about adopting Lera and Vitalik. The events of this past August were humbling, amazing, and just plain a God thing. I decided many weeks ago that if God can make all of the crazy things happen in the way that they did for our new kids to even BE on the trip to America in the first place... and then for us to be at the park and hear about them, and for all of the sparks that were flying to just affirm and affirm that this was God's plan for us, why in the WORLD would I worry that God can't get us through a couple of hours in a Crimean court room!?
So, for several weeks now, I've not felt afraid about court, though I'm sure it will be really intense, and when it gets here, I hope I'll just be able to breathe! I imagine that it will be really scary too for Vitalik and Lera. It is my prayer that as we prepare for, and live through our court date, all of us will feel at peace and will just be able to do our best. Most of all, obviously, I just pray for a good verdict, so that after another waiting period, we can return to begin the 2-3 week process of bringing the kids home for good!
Tonight, Eugene and I took the boys to the airport where we had the privilege of joining in the celebration as we welcomed the first of this summer's kids home for good! David Yaroslav (formerly Yarik) is 13, and has just left the same orphanage that we will be heading to tomorrow.
It is hard to describe how his arrival tonight has provided such a gift of encouragement to our spirits as we set off tomorrow on the next leg of our adventure! We had just seen David kickin' around the orphanage with his pals during our last trip to Ukraine, and now he is home with his new family just a mile or two away from our house! It's like, wow - this can really happen! It was such a blessing to be there tonight to see his new family and friends celebrate his arrival! We hope and pray (and even, dare I say - expect!) that it will not be long before David joins the crowd of family and friends who will form the welcoming party as we arrive home with Vitalik and Lera! Please God, may it be so!!
Monday, February 21, 2011
Patience, Grasshopper...
It has been 23 days since we last saw Vitalik and Lera. For about the last 2 weeks, we have been expecting that any day we will hear our court date and set in motion the flurry of activity that will be required to quickly purchase tickets, prepare for my sister and niece to move back into our house, and head to Ukraine for our adoption proceedings. I have joked that throughout the entire adoption process, I keep hearing Tom Petty singing in my head... The Waiting is the Hardest Part... at least, we certainly hope that it is!
Late last week, we learned that there has been another document that our handler in Ukraine has been waiting for before he can request our court date. We had previously thought all papers were in, so this must have been a request from the court for something additional. We don't understand exactly what this is, but we trust that he knows what he is doing and is taking care of it. It seems that he expects to receive this document today and will be able to call and get our court date. So again this Monday morning, we wake up thinking, "We REALLY expect to hear our court date today or tomorrow."
Throughout this process, we have been asking for prayers for sanity, and all-in-all I think we are managing pretty well. I recently heard someone say that adoption is not for wimps! It's just stressful, no matter how you slice it, and on some level, we won't be able to really exhale until all five of our children are under one roof. Still, we are doing our best to experience this part of our journey as a great lesson in patience. We are TRYING to just enjoy the blessings of each day while we wait, trusting that whenever our court date finally comes, the timing will be exactly as it is supposed to be.
We were recently asked whether this is more or less difficult than a biological pregnancy. It is a really interesting question, and I am sure that anyone who has been through both processes will have their own opinions. For Eugene, this is unquestionably more difficult! I (who never loved being pregnant) think the processes are both difficult (and rich and beautiful) just in different ways.
Our adoption timeline of maybe 7-8 months seems remarkably short compared with pregnancy, and certainly compared with many adoption timelines that many people experience. As such, it sometimes feels a little silly feeling so impatient. Still, we have realized that the timeline is a little different when waiting to adopt teenagers who totally understand what is going on, and who are growing up on the other side of the world while we wait. In some ways, we already grieve the years of their childhoods that we have missed, and that they have missed having a family. Recently, something made me have the poignant realization that I will never be able to pick these kids up and swing them around in a circle or hold them upside-down by their ankles and tickle their tummies. I mean, I know this is obvious, but realizing that those opportunities have already been missed just made me grieve a little bit. Of course, the important thing is that, beginning very soon, we WILL be there to love and support them for the rest of our lives, and I know it is going to be awesome! I guess my point is that every day counts, and the sooner we get to begin being their parents, the happier we will be.
Late last week, we learned that there has been another document that our handler in Ukraine has been waiting for before he can request our court date. We had previously thought all papers were in, so this must have been a request from the court for something additional. We don't understand exactly what this is, but we trust that he knows what he is doing and is taking care of it. It seems that he expects to receive this document today and will be able to call and get our court date. So again this Monday morning, we wake up thinking, "We REALLY expect to hear our court date today or tomorrow."
Throughout this process, we have been asking for prayers for sanity, and all-in-all I think we are managing pretty well. I recently heard someone say that adoption is not for wimps! It's just stressful, no matter how you slice it, and on some level, we won't be able to really exhale until all five of our children are under one roof. Still, we are doing our best to experience this part of our journey as a great lesson in patience. We are TRYING to just enjoy the blessings of each day while we wait, trusting that whenever our court date finally comes, the timing will be exactly as it is supposed to be.
We were recently asked whether this is more or less difficult than a biological pregnancy. It is a really interesting question, and I am sure that anyone who has been through both processes will have their own opinions. For Eugene, this is unquestionably more difficult! I (who never loved being pregnant) think the processes are both difficult (and rich and beautiful) just in different ways.
Our adoption timeline of maybe 7-8 months seems remarkably short compared with pregnancy, and certainly compared with many adoption timelines that many people experience. As such, it sometimes feels a little silly feeling so impatient. Still, we have realized that the timeline is a little different when waiting to adopt teenagers who totally understand what is going on, and who are growing up on the other side of the world while we wait. In some ways, we already grieve the years of their childhoods that we have missed, and that they have missed having a family. Recently, something made me have the poignant realization that I will never be able to pick these kids up and swing them around in a circle or hold them upside-down by their ankles and tickle their tummies. I mean, I know this is obvious, but realizing that those opportunities have already been missed just made me grieve a little bit. Of course, the important thing is that, beginning very soon, we WILL be there to love and support them for the rest of our lives, and I know it is going to be awesome! I guess my point is that every day counts, and the sooner we get to begin being their parents, the happier we will be.
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